You were born on a day that was cluttered with chaos and fear. I remember it so clearly. It was the same day that Nicholas, the little boy next door, ran away from home. The police were out searching for him and I was so scared I’d never see him again. I was daydreaming in my 6th grade classroom when the principal knocked on the door and asked to see me. I shot up out of my desk and ran to him. Anticipating my excitement, he happily announced your arrival into the world!
The darkness of the day was interrupted.
Nicole Elizabeth, born on December 18th weighing 6lbs 8oz. Beautiful and healthy.
Your new life was a beam of light.
Did you know that your Mom made me sit down on the couch before I could hold you? She would prop my arms up with pillows and hesitantly lay you down on my lap. I wasn’t even allowed to move. I could only look at you, smile and make silly faces. Everyone was so afraid I would drop you.
They all went to extravagant lengths to ensure your safety. You were so valuable and so precious that they even protected you from the slightest of dangers.
I was only 11 when you were born and so I’ve always looked at you like a little sister rather than a niece. I looked forward to doing “big sister” things with you…
As you grew, you became even more beautiful. Your first word was “doggy” and I was there to hear you say it. Nicole, your little giggle was unforgettable. We all spent hours trying to make you laugh so that we could enjoy the sound of your happiness.
You loved girly dresses and twirled around to watch them spin. When your mom tried to dress you, you’d check to make sure it was a “spinning outfit.” You boycotted pants and loved everything pink.
Brown eyes, pouty lips and silky blonde curls.
People couldn’t help but stare at you.
Your future was promising; a blank page, pure and unstained. Full of possibilities and prospects.
Everyone loved having you in their world.
Nicole, did you know that the Author of your life wanted to write your story?
Actually, He already had…
“All Your days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be…” Psalm 139:16
He has a story for you. He wrote it before He laid the foundations of the world.
He was waiting to bring those pages to fulfillment…to saturate your world with wonder, beauty and truth.
Nicole, God Himself created you with purpose. He formed your innermost being.
You are not a replica of anyone or anything on planet earth. Yes, you are original.
God placed within you all the things that stir your passions: art, photography, music. Your compassionate heart, your love for people, your desire to help others…your depth…those are all things that God intended to use for His Kingdom. Those are all things that will find their truest value only when given back to and used by the One who made you.
There is no limit to what the Creator of the Universe can do with your gifts.
But more than that, you have infinite value in the sight of God. So much so that He offered a ransom for you. His very own Son.
Sadly though, somewhere along the timeline of your life, like so many of us do, you decided that the story God wrote for you wasn’t good enough and you came up with a new plot; a story of your own. One with more twists and turns, ups and downs, villains and thieves.
Your story and His story clashed and so you parted ways.
But now, as you find yourself in a place you never meant to be in, clenched by the jaws of a substance that has stolen what rightfully belongs to God, I believe you have come to your climax.
And you have a choice to make.
You can continue writing in tragedy, or, you can allow the original Author to take over and conclude in poetry…
teeming with metaphors of hope and true joy.
A happy ending it would be as you live out your years in the shelter of the most HIGH.
Nicole, the beauty of it all is that no matter what you have written on your pages, there is no part of your story that cannot be redeemed and used by an almighty God.
You will never, ever, lose your value in His sight; no matter what you’ve done. He still has a plan for you.
I’m afraid, though, that if you don’t relinquish your life to Him, the best of you and maybe even the rest of you will disappear and you won’t know how fully you are loved and cherished.
I’m taking this moment to ask you…
Would you please get help?
Tell your enemies that they will not steal the best of you! Tell them that God wants the rest of you.
Nicole, Heroin CANNOT have you! You belong to HIM!
He wants you to come home.
Nicole the statistics are grim…the facts are depressing and the reality of addiction is heavy. But your hope is not in your own will to quit… It’s in Christ.
Place it there.
The picture below is from a children’s book I once read.
A small child is sitting on the King’s lap. She seems apprehensive…nervous maybe. She’s wondering about the King and why she’s in such a privileged place. Even more, she’s wondering why she’s being crowned.
But, do you see the King? His eyes are closed. He’s content. His little Princess is safe in His arms, resting on Him. I believe that God wants that little girl to be you.
I know you’ve heard some of this before…but I’ll say it to you over and over.
I love you Nicole…but God loves you so much more,
Love, Aunt Jen
Live a long, purposeful life. Be there for my kids. Be a testimony and a beacon of hope for those walking in the darkness of addiction. With God, all things are possible.
Psalm 40:2 “He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog and set my feet upon a rock making my steps secure.”