My passionate pursuit in life is to fully surrender myself to God’s agenda. I’ve been entrusted with the call to be a wife, a mother and a Christ-like example to my family and friends. I fall, I fail, but by God’s grace I persevere. I aspire to inspire women of all ages to free their faith and be bold in their pursuit of Godliness.
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Every life is a miracle. Ponder what the psalmist says about the creation of life and how precious it is in the sight of God.
“You formed my inward parts; you wove me in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made… My frame was not hidden from you, when I was made in secret and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; your eyes have seen my unformed substance and in your book were all written the days that were ordained for me when as yet there was not one of them!”
When I think of this baby and her little heart that wasn’t formed exactly how it should be, I am tempted to ask God why all this is happening. But when I reflect on what the psalmist says, I am confronted with the fact that my baby has been “skillfully wrought and wonderfully made.” Is she any less of a miracle because her heart is not perfect? Should we celebrate less because we will endure hardship soon after she enters the world? Of course not. Instead we should rejoice that this little miracle will be a conduit of His grace, tenderness and compassion. If she were perfect, we may never know those aspects of our heavenly father. Through this baby, we will come to know Him more and we are thankful for that. As God uses her life to show us more of Himself let us not try to take ownership over her but instead remember that we are just stewards, faithfully helping her to do His bidding.
For those of you who do not know, Wouter and I are expecting a baby in December. She was diagnosed with Transposition of the Great Arteries and will need a complex heart surgery within a few days after birth. In the midst of this unsettling news, we were preparing for our big move to Chicago and wondering if we should go ahead with it. Many questions swarmed our minds about our future steps but we felt strongly that we were to continue walking the path set before us. And I’m so glad we did.
Upon arriving in Chicago, I was able to secure great health insurance which then enabled me to come under the care of some of the best doctors around. After just a few weeks of living here, I have been examined by leading fetal cardiologists and skilled high risk pregnancy doctors. Today (9/9/11), Wouter and I met with the surgeon who will be performing the baby’s Arterial Switch Procedure at Children’s Memorial Hospital. Dr. Carl Backer is one of the nation’s top cardiac surgeons and has performed this procedure many times. In fact, this hospital is a “hub” for this type of surgery.
The medical team tells us that our baby has a very “clean cut” case of TGA. In other words, there are no other complications with her heart. Often, other defects exist along with this one but so far, the doctors do not see any. This is great news and simplifies both the surgery and the possible post operation complications. All of the doctors seem very optimistic about the baby and her prognosis.
With great medical care in place and a sense of peace that both me and this baby will be well looked after, we can focus on the emotional aspect of coping with what lies ahead. We need a lot of prayer. As good as it is to have a simple version of TGA, we are still facing the reality that our baby is going to have open heart surgery just days after entering the world. The possible complications that can arise are scary. Dr. Backer has reassured us that less than 5% of babies have complications and so we are praying to be part of the 95% who do not. Please keep us close in your prayers as we walk through this difficult time. We want to look beyond the natural and glean whatever heavenly wisdom we can but we need to stay above our fears in order to do that.
Last night I heard a familiar song. One verse says “Here in our weakness you’ll find us falling before your throne…” It is interesting how confidently we stand before God’s throne when all is well in our lives and how quickly we fall before it when circumstances weaken us. I believe that God really wants us to be in a posture of brokenness before Him continually. Unfortunately, it often takes hardship to produce a broken, humble saint.
*Thanks for your prayers and for your faithful kind thoughts toward us. We will be posting updates on this blog rather than sending emails. If you want to receive blog updates, you can sign up on the top right corner of the blog page. Also, if you are interested in learning more about Transposition of the Great Arteries, watch the short video linked on the right sidebar.